The pronouns “they,” “them,” and “their” have traditionally been used for plural subjects. However, in recent years, their use as singular pronouns for people who identify as non-binary or whose gender is unknown has become increasingly common and accepted.
Here’s a breakdown of how “they,” “them,” and “their” can be used in the singular context:
When to Use Singular “They”
- For Non-Binary People: If someone identifies as non-binary (a gender identity that falls outside the categories of male and female), they may prefer “they” as their pronoun. It’s important to respect their preference and use “they” consistently when referring to them.
- When Gender is Unknown: When you don’t know a person’s gender identity, using “they” is a safe and inclusive way to refer to them. This avoids making assumptions and ensures you’re respectful.
- Indefinite Pronoun: “They” can also be used as a singular pronoun when referring to someone in a general or indefinite sense.
Examples:
- Non-Binary: “Jamie came to the party. They brought a delicious cake!”
- Unknown Gender: “Someone left their phone at the library. I hope they come back for it.”
- Indefinite: “Everyone deserves to be happy, no matter who they are.”
Using “Them” and “Their” in the Singular Context:
- “Them” and “their” naturally follow the singular “they” pronoun.
- Examples:
- “I haven’t seen Jamie in a while. I wonder how they are doing.” (Subject – “Jamie”, Pronoun – “they”, Possessive – “their”)
- “Someone left their wallet at the restaurant. Can you help them find it?” (Subject – “Someone”, Pronoun – “they”, Possessive – “their”)
Tips for Using Singular “They”
- Agreement: When using “they” as a singular pronoun, verbs should conjugate to agree with the singular subject.
- Correct: “They is my best friend.”
- Incorrect: “They are my best friends.”
- Practice Makes Perfect: The more you encounter and use singular “they,” the more comfortable you’ll become.
- Respect Individual Preferences: Always prioritize a person’s self-identified pronouns. If someone tells you their pronouns, use them consistently.
By embracing the singular usage of THEY THEM THEIR as Singular Pronouns, we can promote inclusivity and respect for everyone’s gender identity.